Happy Halloween!

It’s a Were-Coconut. Its cute.

Hey, guys! Ok, I think we ALL know whats going on here… Halloween! Ah, Halloween, the one day a year where a man can walk down the street wearing a mask and carrying a sickle, and not get stopped by the police. Actually… the one day a man can wear a mask, carry a sickle, and offer sweets to random children, and not get stopped by the police.

Do you like the picture? I think I’m going to start including them in my posts because I think they brighten them up? They do, don’t you think?

Ok, with that said… Halloween. Now, I’m not American, I’m English, and Halloween really isn’t that big of a deal here. Don’t get me wrong, we still dress up and trick-or-treat and all that jazz, but we don’t get as EMOTIONAL about it as Americans seem to. I don’t know about Australia, France and Canada though, is it big there too? To be honest, I’ve only had one trick-or-treater today, and they’ve already pissed me off. I mean, who trick or treats at 5 pm?

Anyways, that being said, I think the best part of Halloween is the scary stories. Not because they’re actually scary, but because they are so amazingly stupid that they’re funny. I mean, half the characters in these stories bring death upon themselves. I mean, look at these first sentences.

1. One Halloween, the parents of a young girl, due to prior arrangements, were forced to leave her home alone for the night. Seriously, if your child can be described in a story as a ‘young girl’… they shouldn’t be left alone at home. And especially on Halloween; they really want to tempt fate, don’t they? Like, what if she gets attacked by demons? Who she gonna call? Ghostbusters?

2. An old woman lived alone on a foggy hill, miles away from any village or town. Well… I can’t see anything going wrong here. I’m taking now as an oppurtunity to promise to both my parents: I will NEVER let you live like that in your old age. Never. :3

3. The parents of a young girl had an interest of clowns, and so collected clown items from around the world, and kept them all in one room. Oh wow. Wow, wow, wow. Well I must tell you, that aside from spiders, and the devil himself, clowns are the scariest thing on this planet. Anybody, ANYBODY who is sane, would not bring that kind of evil into their home. And do you know what? I am not surprised that some escaped murderers decide to dress up as clowns. They go hand in hand.

4. A woman gave birth to a child whose father was the devil. Ok, I think we’re done for the day.

Anyways, I think Halloween is good. Because sometimes its nice to have an excuse to eat sweets, and stuff. And since i just realised I’m home alone… I’m going to plan my emergency exits and what not.

And believe me, if i die tonight… I am SO haunting my enemies!